Kit Robbins
Kit Robbins

I saw you in an Aldrich alcove (south side, bottom floor) drinking Peet’s Coffee at 5:30AM last Monday morning. Not many people are up that early. You must’ve been saving the spot for your discussion group. I knew you were a thoughtful soul. I popped by and asked if I could sit down. You said no. I wish I had asked for your name.

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At Shad around 8PM tonight. You were in squash court #7 (one of the glass American courts). I was walking down the stairs to go spinning. Your bright orange shorts caught my eye. We made eye contact through the reflection of your squash goggles. I like your technique. Can we play sometime?

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We chatted Friday afternoon while waiting in line at Spangler Grille. You were making the most of Frozen Yogurt Fridays. I feel like someone who prioritizes the sweeter things in life is someone right for me. Can I buy you your next frozen yogurt? To make sure it’s you, send me your favorite frozen yogurt topping of choice, and we’ll take it from there.

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The first time I saw you, you were holed up in a Chase tunnel study room for a solid 7+ hours the night before our TOM midterm. Odds are you are meant to be a Baker Scholar. I consider that quality marriage material. Please send me your resume, and we can discuss your lifelong earning potential and how it maps against my forecasts.

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Hey. I think I first met you at the Gatsby Party. And then I saw you at the White Party and the 80s Party and the Down Under Ball. I’m pretty sure I saw you at the Stoplight Party too, but you were wearing blue, which was confusing. Unless you’re color blind, in which case, I feel bad. I’ve never seen you before 11PM anywhere on campus. Do you even go here?

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When I first saw you, I was so impressed that you both love puppies and are brave enough to pet tigers. I had to swipe right. I’m pretty sure we’re hallway neighbors in One Western. How come we haven’t matched yet? I see you swiping while waiting in the laundry room.

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I know it’s risky we’re section mates, and it’s even riskier we’re seatmates, but everytime I sit next to you, my heart flutters a little. Even more than it does when I get a FIN cold call. I know I may be out of wacc and taking on a huge liability, but I have a feeling that if I don’t put my foot down, you’re going to get acquired by someone who’s not triple A– authentically affectionate & amazing. Let my assets balance it all out?

Kit Robbins is part of Section Z, the best-looking, most politically correct and inclusive section at HBS. Aside from sitting in Spangler drinking coffee and pretending to read cases, Kit does pretty much nothing at HBS. When it’s cold out, you can find Kit wearing flip-flops in the tunnels and stealing/enjoying Chex mix and M&M’s from the i-Lab.